Getting rid of bloat:
Okay I’ll try bang this out real fast because I know you lot can’t bare learning new stuff that will change your life.
There are 3 types of bloating that you need to care about:
- Constipation
- Food Choice Bloating
- Water Retention
1. Constipation
First thing you need to do is look at your water and fibre intake. Stop moaning on and do something about it.
If you have a bunch of grapes hanging from your bum it’s because of not drinking enough water, and the food you're eating.
See this fella above, his fibre intake is shite, he drinks little water, and eats a lot of processed food. He spends most of his time moaning to friends and family about how unfortunate he is, when in reality, it's all his own making.
And surprise surprise, this blog is NOT about anyone suffering with conditions like Crohn's etc, so if you're ready to rip into me, pause and think... "ah, I'm not the only person following Team RH", he's probably on about the other 99.9% of the page with shite food choices and not me with this specific condition.
Big love to you guys having a bad time though, just all I'm asking is you don't go back to your Crohn's support group and slag me rotten like I was gunning for you guys. I'm sorry you're having a bad time, and I don't mean any disrespect to you or any others with medical conditions. EVER.
Back to this, so unless you want your bum hole to stop looking like a ripped out fireplace, I’d suggest learning about insoluble and soluble fibre, and making sure you get the right ratio of both. If you’re on the Life Plan, we have in depth articles about this on our app. If you have IBS then it's absolutely ESSENTIAL you learn about both types of fibre.
Think about it, you feel bloated because your intestines have been extended. So if you're constipated, all that is basically full of rubbish.
2. Food-choice bloating - Which foods bloat you?
Who here has a little food baby sometimes when they eat? I certainly do. Well if you care about this (usually women if they’re wearing a tight-fitting dress), you need to start writing a food diary.
Just write down the meal name, and put a happy or miserable face next to it or write how it made you look and feel.
- "What should the food diary look like?"
- "What food causes bloat?"
- "What foods should I avoid?"
I don't know exactly what your food diary should be like, it depends on the scenario. It's just basically something for you to understand, which will make sense to you. Here is my example...
After a few weeks of tracking that, you can look back and hopefully be able to cross-reference.
Everyone is different though, I know for me that a bowl of oats always makes me look preggaz.
The volume of food you eat also has a huge role to play. If you smash down a huge portion then you’re gonna look bloated 'til your body digests it, regardless of what food it is, so please take this into consideration.
3. Water Retention
Now, this is a big one, and it's a bit science'y. So I'll pop this video I did a few years back. Only thing I could add to it, is to make sure you get plenty of potassium in your diet from fruit and veg.
Team RH